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What if animals were round?

April 23, 2014

A note on the Norgolian Empire

April 21, 2014

I have to admit something. The name of the Norgolian Empire, the home of the characters of Cannon Fodder, isn’t original by me. I lifted it from “The Eye of Argon,” a remarkable short story by Jim Theis.

Now in the public domain, the short story was first published in 1970 in OSFAN, a fanzine. It’s … well, it’s more or less Conan the Barbarian fanfic, but that doesn’t do it justice. I first ran into the story at a party game at Science Fiction and Fantasy club back in college. We’d printed out copies of the story and handed them out to the participants. The object of the game was to read an entire page of the story out loud, pronouncing all the spelling errors, and keep a straight face. I’m pretty sure nobody won that night.

You have to see this story to believe it.

I’ve read godawful writing before, but “The Eye of Argon” manages to transcend godawfulness and become a kind of work of art. I wanted to celebrate this story by throwing the name of the Norgolian Empire into Cannon Fodder. Theis’s short story is about the Empire’s outer reaches, so who knows what might be going on at the capitol? Hence the setting for Cannon Fodder. I like to think that at the time of Alec’s kraken problems, Grignr is still out there somewhere, hacking away at other barbarians.

Bud break!

April 14, 2014

Bud break bud break bud break!

IMG_1469

Cannon Fodder is out!

April 7, 2014

CannonFodder_Type_smallI’m pleased to announce that the formatting and publishing of Cannon Fodder went smoothly, and it’s now available for purchase at most mainstream e-book sites. Check it out:

Smashwords
Amazon
Barnes and Noble

I also got a news spot written about me and the book.

Spring!

April 2, 2014

Spring is here, spring is here.
Life is skittles and life is beer.
I think the loveliest time of the year is the spring.
I do, don’t you? ‘Course you do.
But there’s one thing that makes spring complete for me,
And makes ev’ry Sunday a treat for me.

IMG_1445All the world seems in tune
On a spring afternoon,
When we’re poisoning pigeons in the park.
Ev’ry Sunday you’ll see
My sweetheart and me,
As we poison the pigeons in the park.

IMG_1446

When they see us coming, the birdies all try an’ hide,
But they still go for peanuts when coated with cyanide.
The sun’s shining bright,
Ev’rything seems all right,
When we’re poisoning pigeons in the park.

IMG_1450We’ve gained notoriety,
And caused much anxiety
In the Audubon Society
With our games.
They call it impiety,
And lack of propriety,
And quite a variety
Of unpleasant names.
But it’s not against any religion
To want to dispose of a pigeon.

IMG_1452So if Sunday you’re free,
Why don’t you come with me,
And we’ll poison the pigeons in the park.
And maybe we’ll do
In a squirrel or two,
While we’re poisoning pigeons in the park.

IMG_1453

We’ll murder them all amid laughter and merriment.
Except for the few we take home to experiment.
My pulse will be quickenin’
With each drop of strychnine
We feed to a pigeon.
It just takes a smidgen!
To poison a pigeon in the park.

 

Original lyrics are by Tom Lehrer. No actual pigeons were harmed making this blog post.

It snowed again since I took these photos, but I still maintain that it’s spring. Sort of.

Cannon Fodder’s Kickstarter campaign is complete

March 31, 2014

As of the closing of the campaign on March 28, we’d raised $266, or 118% of the $225 goal. Thanks to all the backers, here’s the cover art that you have made possible:

CannonFodder_Type_small

Yeah! Again many thanks to Kelsey King, the illustrator who drew this. E-books of Cannon Fodder with this cover will be available at Smashwords and Amazon very soon. I’ll keep you guys posted.

Cool Kickstarter Projects: The Bacterionomicon and Skies of Fire

March 19, 2014

First of all, I’m happy to announce that the Kickstarter campaign for Cannon Fodder‘s cover art is now fully funded. Thanks to everyone who backed the project. There’s still ten days left on the campaign, so if you want a copy of the book or you want to help it meet its reach goal, check it out.

Meanwhile, here’s a few more Kickstarter campaigns that I think are pretty awesome:

Image courtesy of the campaign page.

Image courtesy of the campaign page.

The Bacterionomicon by Nerdcore Medical

Nerdcore Medical is a tiny company based in Texas that makes educational games based on the founder’s own experience going through med school. Their latest project: the Bacterionomicon, a lushly illustrated book where antibiotics are cast as clerics and infectious diseases are eldritch abominations. Just check out the illustrations on this thing.

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Image courtesy of the campaign page.

Image courtesy of the campaign page.

Skies of Fire by Ray Chou

Another project I picked out for its gorgeousness. It’s a full-color webcomic about various fantasy nations doing airship battles with each other. Need I say more?

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